Witchy Days 19: Reveals

Note: Mentions of miscarriage.

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After their visit to the cemetery, Matthew and Terra insisted on Monica coming home with them. Matthew, because he believed he and his mother had quite a bit to discuss right now and Terra, because she wasn’t sure she wanted Monica to stay by herself after an emotional moment like the one she had just gone through.

On the one hand, she thought the mother and son had a right to know the full story of what happened to Mitchell. But on the other hand, Terra couldn’t shake off the opinion that hashing it all out this many years later was kind of selfish on Mitchell’s part. Monica had over 20 years to deal with whatever feelings she had for him and Terra was afraid that this meeting might’ve reopened old wounds or even made new ones.

Of course, if that was the case, the woman wasn’t showing it. If anything, she seemed cheerful.

“What is the deal with all these Bigfoot hunters looking and behaving like they’ve been destroying their brain with a fancy mix of drugs for the entirety of their life? I’m just saying, maybe if they had gone looking for him sober, they’d actually find him,” she commented on the show that Terra put on for some background noise.

“If they were sober, would they really be looking for Bigfoot?” Terra joked.

“Nope,” Matthew decided. “But then, we wouldn’t have shows like these.”

“Bold of you all to assume there is no Bigfoot equivalent of potheads,” Bartholomew snickered. “Who do you think gets spotted by these types?”

“This is a good point!” Monica chuckled, after Terra translated Barthy’s joke. “Takes all kinds to make the world. It’s all the more fun. Speaking of fun, how’s work going for you two?”

“I’m good, I got a promotion a while back,” Terra told her.

“And I’m actually looking for something else now,” Matthew told her. “I quit that place.”

“Really? What happened?” Monica was surprised.

“You mean, Jedediah didn’t tell you?” Matt asked. “I thought he’d complain to you.”

“No, I haven’t actually talked to him since… when was it you quit?” she asked.

“About a week ago.”

“Since then,” she said. “Did something weird happen?”

“I’ll say. That crazy daughter of his sent me nudes. This was the last straw. I quit and showed him why. Thought he should know why all of his workers keep quitting on him.”

“What?” Terra stopped mid-thought. “You showed him? His daughter’s nudes?!”

“And I deleted them afterwards,” he reassured her.

“Why would you show a man his daughter’s naked pictures?!” Terra confronted him.

“Terra? This is Elspeth we’re talking about. The same person who’s been harassing me since day one. And who sent your boyfriend her naked pictures, even though I’ve never expressed any sort of interest in her. Why are you angry at me?” Matthew was confused.

“Because I didn’t think you’d do something like this!”

“Do what, Terra? Another guy would’ve kept those pictures or leaked them all over the internet. Another guy would’ve taken both her and her father to court for all they’re worth – and won. I didn’t do any of that. I simply showed that man proof of what his daughter was doing to his workers,” Matthew reasoned. “Why are you making me out to be the bad guy?”

“Because he’s her father,” she shrugged. The idea that someone could someday show her Dad her pictures that way was disconcerting.

“Yes. He is. That’s the point.” Matthew was at a loss for words.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked.

“About the pictures? Because I already knew what I was going to do as soon as I received them. And I didn’t want you to worry about it.”

“I see.” She pinched the bridge of her nose to make her eyes stop tearing up. This wasn’t how she pictured the day going. Or anything at all. “I need some space.”

As she stormed out of the room, Matthew looked at his mother.

“I don’t understand. I thought she would see this from my point of view.”

“Well, it was a questionable thing to do,” Monica admitted.

“So, I was in the wrong? I was just fed up with her,” he explained. “I normally would never do something like this.”

“I know,” Monica nodded. “It’s a gray situation. I mean, you have a point – sooner or later, someone would’ve taken them to court over her behavior. And the last time I’ve stopped by that shop, she was working there. Not very well, I might add, but he was telling her when she made mistakes.”

“Elspeth?! No way!”

“I know. I think it’s Jed’s way of making her learn some responsibility. So, it does look like he took her actions seriously.”

“Well, at least something good came out of this mess,” Matthew sighed. “But how do I make things right with Terra?”

“Give her some time to calm down and talk to her. I admit, I also didn’t expect this kind of a reaction from her,” Monica told him.

Terra just wanted to wash her face and cool down from the confrontation.

Why did the stupid sink have to break right now?

It was a brand new house. Things should have been in good working order.

Just like this relationship.

Just like the communication between her and Matt.

Just like the pregnancy.

Just like everything else…

She thought bringing her brother home safe and sound would fix things in her life. She thought having Matthew here, in the same town, in the same house, would make her life complete.

But damn it, she felt so lost all the time… as she watched the stupid thing leak water all over the floor, she knew she had to fix it, but really, she just didn’t have the energy.

This was how Monica found her when she needed to use the bathroom and heard the water running for a really long time.

“Terra? Honey, are you alright?”

“…..”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“…Maybe?”

Monica joined her on the ground, disregarding the sizeable puddle of water that was starting to collect next to them.

“Between the two of us, I agree that showing those pictures to Jed wasn’t the smartest move on my son’s part. Even though I see the factors that led to that decision. He should’ve quit months ago, which would’ve meant giving up on something. But as we can see, stubbornness and impulsivity run in the family.”

“I guess they do” Terra agreed. “Can’t even blame him for acting impulsively, I’ve done that hundreds of times myself…” Sometimes in ways that would’ve endangered herself and others, she knew.

“This isn’t just about the pictures, is it?” Monica asked. She already had a pretty good idea of what happened, but at this point, it was still guesswork on her part.

“No, it isn’t,” Terra admitted. She found herself spilling everything to her. About the unexpected pregnancy and its equally unexpected end, about feeling out of sorts all the time, about the constant fear that something bad will happen to people she cares about. About constantly feeling lost and out of place at work, where everyone complimented her work ethic. “I just don’t know what I’m doing with my life.”

Monica listened attentively, nodding along and understanding what was going on in Terra’s head. Finally, she said, “No wonder you’ve been feeling so terrible, dear. Frankly, it would’ve been strange if you weren’t feeling like this. You’ve gone through what most would call a traumatic life experience – nearly losing your twin. Just because you got him back safe and sound doesn’t mean those worries are going to naturally dissipate. And don’t even get me started on everything that happened at Boris Crimson’s house. Matt told me what I’m sure is only a small part of it all and I’m already horrified. Wouldn’t be surprised if that whole family and all of the students are in therapy right now.”

“You’re not wrong. At least about one of them,” Terra remembered Polina mention once when they were chatting that she was seeing a therapist. Terra thought it a good idea for the girl at the time, but thinking about it all now, maybe it was a good idea for her as well?

“I won’t tell you that worrying about current events is unreasonable,” Monica continued. “Especially after what happened at your sister-in-law’s house. You are right to be on high alert. But about the miscarriage – that’s not something you have to carry alone. Too many of us women do this and it serves no one. It only hurts and makes you feel more alone.”

“You think I should tell him?” Terra asked.

“Yes. This is something you should deal with together. After all, it takes more than one person to create a pregnancy. Dealing with its end should not be on one person either.”

“Thank you,” Terra told her. “For listening. I’m sorry I made you deal with all this today.”

“You mean Mitchell?” she smiled. “I know you’re worried that I’m about to have some sort of breakdown after talking to him. It’s actually quite the opposite.”

“How so?” Terra asked.

“My whole life, after that breakup, I’ve been comparing every potential partner to him. Even after the pain he caused me,” Monica smiled sadly. “And meeting him now was like ending up in the days of my youth, but with the knowledge I have today. Don’t get me wrong, I still wanted him, which is probably not what you would expect to hear from your boyfriend’s mother!”

Monica laughed at that. “You must admit, the man has always been a looker.”

“True, I can see why you were into him,” Terra smiled a bit.

“Oh yes. Except, while we were talking, I could suddenly see exactly how our life together would’ve gone. And we would not have lasted. Maybe we would’ve stayed together for a few years. Maybe we would have had a few more kids together, until it all imploded on us. He was always impulsive, Mitchell was. And while it seemed very romantic to seventeen-year-old me, I know even a few years into my twenties, I would’ve found it extremely irritating. So, while I’m extremely sad for what happened to him and can now mourn the loss of my son’s father, I can finally stop mourning the relationship that we could’ve had.”

“That’s a really neat way of looking at things,” Terra admitted, realizing that Monica was right about this.

“I hope so. But really, talk to him about what happened. I know he was really worried about you a few weeks ago.”

“I know and I wanted to tell him,” Terra told her. “I just couldn’t bring myself to do it, somehow. I never thought we’d have to deal with miscarriage this early into the relationship.”

“No one ever does,” Monica told her. “It gets everyone by surprise.”

Matthew was just looking for the women after they have both disappeared on him when he overheard the last part. Suddenly, everything that’s been happening with Terra lately made perfect sense.

Coming into the bathroom, he was about to say something to them when he noticed the still broken sink that was threatening to flood the whole room.

Talk would have to wait until he dealt with this mess, which he tackled with fervor.

Eventually, the sink was fixed, the water dried up, and the women were both looking at him with anticipation.

“Mom?” he asked.

“Dear? Terra, I’ll give you two some space, alright?”

“Hey,” he joined her, trying to figure out the right words to say. “Are you angry at me?”

“I don’t know,” she told him. “I don’t like that you did this.”

“I get that I should’ve thought it through first,” he conceded. “Can’t go back in time and change it now. I’m sorry about it, though. Sort of. I’m sorry that I did something to make you upset.”

“It’s ok, you don’t have to pretend to regret it,” Terra told him. “I can’t honestly say that I wouldn’t have behaved the same way in your shoes. It’s just the whole situation is so ugh.”

“You would’ve found a better way to deal with this, I’m sure,” he smiled. “You’re good at that stuff.”

“Are you just saying that to make me feel better because you’ve overheard the talk between me and your Mom?” she asked.

“I’m saying it because I really think so. And I really don’t like fighting with you,” he told her. “Can we not fight anymore?”

“I don’t like fighting with you either,” she told him. “I don’t know if it’s possible to never fight anymore. All couples fight sometimes.”

“Alright, then can we not fight unless we absolutely have to?” he asked.

“I suppose we can try,” she told him. “But you haven’t really answered my question.”

“I did hear the last part,” he admitted. “How come you never told me?”

“I wanted to, at first and I was going to once I got over it. But then I didn’t want to make you sad,” she told him. “And I guess, a part of me was afraid that you won’t be sad. I know we didn’t plan to have children yet and this pregnancy came out of nowhere.”

“No, we didn’t plan to start a family yet. That doesn’t mean I don’t want children, especially with you. Although, you’re probably right that I don’t feel as sad about it as you do – simply because I found out about it after it was over. I didn’t go through getting my hopes up the way you did.”

“I didn’t have much time to get my hopes up,” she admitted. “I only found out in the morning and in the evening it was over.”

“That sucks. Are you ok?”

“I don’t know. But I think I will be now.”

“Ok. Hey, can we not keep things like that from one another?” he asked.

“I think we can manage.”

“I think we should do something fun and relaxing soon,” he told her, as they headed back to the room. “No work, no school, just something for unwinding.”

“I’d like that,” she told him. “Your Mom’s right, we’ve been through some serious stuff a few months ago and it all takes a toll.”

“Can’t argue with that,” he agreed, hugging her. “Maybe we should go somewhere. Like a vacation?”

“That’s a nice idea. Hey, what’s that smell?”

“Mom’s cooking Mac’n’Cheese,” he recognized the smell. “Perfect comfort food.”

“Oh no, we were supposed to be taking care of her today!” Terra exclaimed. “And now, she’s taking care of us.”

“Honestly, I don’t think we need to worry about her right now. She got to tell my Dad all those things she’s been holding in for two decades. That counts for something.”

“What about you?” she asked. “How do you feel about meeting him?”

“Honestly? I think I’m pretty happy with the parent that raised me. He’s really not what I imagined. But who knows, maybe he’ll grow on me? I wonder if he’s going to want to check in with us like that every now and then or if this was a one time thing.”

“Do you want him to?”

“I guess it’s fine with me, as long as I don’t have to start calling him ‘Dad’ – that’s just too weird right now,” he admitted.

“Fair enough.”

Sometimes, unhealthy and cheesy foods really are good for the soul.